Career limiting moves

I usually write about the positive stuff. The stuff to help you with your career. The stuff to make it better, more fruitful, more satisfying.

Today that is not the case. Today I received an email that one male employee had forwarded to many other employees and customers which contained photos of naked women in poses and situations which would be considered demeaning. I’m definitely not a prude and on one hand this stuff is mostly harmless. On the other hand I wonder how much we have really progressed in organisations to attain equality of pay and positions for women when there is still this undercurrent of women being presented and treated as sexual objects and as comedic relief for men. Is this how they imagine the women that work with?

 Of course using our electronic systems to distribute this kind of content is prohibited. As most companies do, we have all sorts of policies which address this kind of stuff – from acceptable use of our IT systems to harassment and discrimination policies, and I’m now in the situation of dealing with a number of employees who are probably considered valuable members of their team, who may or may not keep their job.

 Distributing this information is definitely an obvious career limiting move. If you don’t lose your job over it, at the very least you will not be seen positively. Promotions and other opportunities may not come your way and you will definitely not be viewed in the best light. But what other things can limit your career? Here are my top 5 behaviours that have the potential to limit your career:

 

 1.       Not playing nicely with others.

I once worked with a manager who had an employee in his team who didn’t want to work with others. The days are gone where roles exist for employees to sit in a corner and work alone processing paperwork or number crunching. Today’s organisations are lean with a heavy focus on being able to communicate and collaborate. This employee refused to attend meetings, refused to share information with other team members and was generally a very difficult person to deal with. He was asked to continue his career somewhere else.

2.       Being difficult
I reckon I can get on and work with most people. It doesn’t mean I always like everyone but man, there is a person I have worked with who was so difficult that nearly every time I needed to speak to this person there would be a disagreement about what I was trying to achieve. I often just needed a short answer or a document review and this person was supposed to be a business partner and resource. At the very least an equal in supporting what the business required.

They turned out to be the opposite and other leaders in the business admitted that they left things to the last minute before having to talk to this person, and only then it was out of desperation. It was never pleasant dealing with this person. Ugh!

Having people who will support you in your organisation is important if you want to progress. The more senior you become the more important it is to be seen as credible and have sound influencing skills. Crucial skills in developing your career.
 
3.       Being too sensitive
We all have tough times at work. We are human and it’s kinda hard to check your emotions at the door. I don’t expect anyone to do this and it’s ok to cry at work BUT the person who continually gets upset or worked up about EVERYTHING does not make for a pleasant workplace. The person you have to tippy-toe around or the person that if you even look sideways at and they become upset or offended is very very difficult. These people also make giving feedback hard.  If others are afraid to give you feedback because you will burst into tears or will make a bullying complaint, well you may not have a fruitful career. You will be avoided at all costs. Just saying.
 
Most large companies have employee assistance programs (EAP) who offer free counseling if you are struggling to cope with life or GP’s (in Australia at least) can provide referrals to psychologists and counselors which initially can be funded through Medicare . Get some help. Most people just need some help with some coping strategies to get them back on track.

 4.       Being obnoxious

I have worked with a couple of people like this. I’m sure you know some too. These are the people who say inappropriate and offensive things at inappropriate moments. Sometimes it comes out work events with the additional of alcohol and sometimes it’s at Wednesday at 10.30am in the meeting about improving a business processes.

Other people that fall under this category are those who are so egotistical that they expect everyone to work the hours they do, and at the standard they do. Other’s become scared of these people and avoid them at all costs – it’s hard to progress in your career if no one wants to be near you, let alone work with you.
 
5.       Being defensive
At the risk of sounding slightly unstable, a few years ago I made friends with the voice in my head which tells me to shut up when I feel the need to defend. The problem with being defensive is that it comes from an emotional place. If you end up in an emotional space it can be hard to communicate clearly and get the best outcome you want. I’m ok with emotion (in fact emotion drives passion and engagement) but the trick is to use it for effect. To have control and use it wisely. If you have a tendency to always defend, you are not listening, not taking in information and not being effective.

When I first started in my corporate career I was definitely defensive. My Manager used to hold up his hand to say “stop”. Stop talking and stop defending. Now my little voice does that and it’s so effective. I’m now able to truly understand why someone may have an issue with me and not be emotional in my reaction. It means that I am in a place where I can ask questions, gain more clarify and get a better outcome. It also puts me in a place that if I need to explain my position I have control over what and how I’m saying it. I get to say my piece with a better chance that someone else will listen. I’d like to say I’m good at it all the time, but of course I’m not. But I’m really conscious of it.

There are many career limiting moves I can think of – many very obvious, but it’s the more subtle ones like the 5 outlined above which are more insidious and hard to identify, but will make the biggest difference in reaching your career goals if you can tackle them.

Lisa xx

Dress for Success

You probably think I'm going to write about clothes and your career. Well, kind of. It's actually a topic I could bang on about in a number of posts....how taking pride in what you wear shows pride in your work....how you can dress well without spending a lot of money.....dressing to suit your shape and job....dressing to get the job you want....

BUT, I'm going to write about syncronicity and supporting a charity, how important connections are, and how taking an opportunity can lead to other opportunities. The main point is to tell you about Dress for Success. The best way you can learn about this great organisation, is to watch this video.

This week I attended one of their business dinners, as a guest of Xplore for Success and was reminded again what an amazing organisation they are. They help women who are struggling or disadvantaged to achieve financial independence by helping them to find jobs. Their main level is support is dressing them for job interviews, through donated clothing, but other support includes helping with resume writing and teaching interview skills.

I first became aware of Dress for Success through Amanda Webb, an amazing woman and a friend, who runs her own business, my favourite part being her OneDay NewWays conference. Amanda supports Dress for Success as one of her chosen charities. Through Amanda I got interested, I attended volunteer training - to help dress their clients, and then did nothing. I couldn't even get my shit organised to donate clothes. What's wrong with me? Seriously, I live a great life and couldn't even volunteer for a few hours every couple of weeks. Life, work and babies got in the way.

With my guilt rising I came to the realisation that it's not like I do nothing. For the past 12 years, ever since I travelled back and forth to work to India over a 12 month period for work, I have sponsored a child with World Vision and supported a community fund with them. I am lucky to be in a position with my work to coordinate and lead support of community organisations and charities including RU OK? and Tour De Cure. I also support friends in their various charity endeavors but somehow if never feels quite enough.

But man, this organisation is persistent! It keeps coming back into my life. Through events I attend, other women I meet and connections I have made. These all keep bringing me back and reminding me that this organisation is something I need to be involved with, or at least support in some way.
Dress for Success is a perfect match for what I think is important. I believe dressing well helps boost your confidence and creating a good first impression goes a long way to securing a job. I also believe that having a job is important as it supports self esteem and financial independence. I ranted wrote about it here.

I have realised that at this time in my life, volunteering my time is just not going to work. I travel a lot and time with my two small boys and husband is precious. This needs to be my focus now, so I will support in other ways. I will attend their events, donate clothes and do things like spread the word with blog posts like this one.


When I was being interviewed for my current role, I learnt that part of the role in the first 6 months or so would be to bring together our employees into one default superannuation fund. I'm kinda passionate about super. About employees taking an active role in part of their remuneration that doesn't get thought about much. About making decisions about how their money is invested and how they protect themselves and their family through insurance. About considering whether enough money is going into their super account.

I also love clothes and fashion.

So this is why I think Dress for Success is such a fantastic organisation to support. Helping women feel great about themselves by having a great interview outfit - leads to creating a good first impression and in many cases a job, which leads to financial independence. I have to stop ignoring the "universe" which keeps telling me to find a way to support this charity.

This is my first step.