Do what you love. Love what you do.....

I'm here at the Gold Coast attending the Problogger conference. I have been looking forward to this conference for months. I came last year for the first time and it was awesome. I wrote about networking while I was here. Anyway, I haven't been looking forward to this conference because it's nice to be across the road from the beach, although that is nice.

And it's not because I'm staying at the QT Hotel which I love. I get to stay in lots of hotels and this one is a fav because it has character. It's fun and cheeky. Check it out!

And it's not because I finally put my sneakers on my feet and actually went for a walk this afternoon so that their trip from Singapore to Perth to Brisbane to the Gold Coast, wasn't for nothing.

No. The reason I have been looking forward to this conference is because bloggers are passionate about what they do. They live their passion and they love talking about it. There is so much energy and excitement here. This is in contrast to some conferences I have been to. In particular people at HR type conferences like to whinge during the conference breaks. They like to talk about how they don't have big enough budgets and about how no one takes them seriously and stuff like that. I hate it. Doesn't happen at a blogging conference. Nope.

In my experience blogging conferences are about connecting and sharing and learning and passion. It's about sharing where you are from and what you blog about. It's about sharing where you are at on the blogging journey. Are you new at it? Have you been doing it for a few years?  Or are you pro? And it's ok wherever you are at. Sometimes blogging can be a lonely pursuit despite connecting with people through social media so I suspect bloggers also just like to get out and socialise! The welcome drinks at the bar tonight was packed!

The other excitement here is getting to see and meet some amazing people. I have already spied the very striking and talented Clare Bowditch heading to the lift (she was on Offspring, apart from being a great musician) and met Chantelle Ellem from FatMumSlim in the lift and she is gorgeous! I would say she thinks I'm an idiot at this point. Chantelle does the photo a day challenge on Instagram.

The conference starts tomorrow so I better get my hair washed and my outfit sorted.

Lisa xx

Exit Interviews

Ever been through an exit interview? You know, you have resigned your job and someone from HR, like me, gets in contact to ask you about your experience working at XYZ Company. Then someone from HR, like me, collates exit interview information and presents it to your Manager or group of Managers with the idea that they will take the information and use it to make XYZ Company a better place to work for all. That's the theory. It's one of those theories that HR people, like me, hold dear to their hearts.

Unfortunately the reality is somewhat different.

This week one of my lovely Sydney friends who has been working for a pretty crappy ordinary organisation secured a new role in a much less crappy ordinary organisation and you guessed it, has been asked to complete an exit interview. She wanted some advice. I wanted blog post inspiration. Here we are.

It would be fair to say that I feel a little, well a lot jaded about what happens with exit interview information. You see, HR people, like me, take the activity of understanding the experience of an employee and why they have chosen to leave an organisation quite seriously. HR people, like me, like to do things that make organisations good places to work. Feeding back exit interview information is one way to do this.

The trouble is that most managers and leaders tend to stay a while at organisations and some, not all don't realise that XYZ Company may not be the best most satisfying place to work. Some, not all don't realise or have forgotten that there may be other places employees want to work because, well...it's less shit!* So what happens is HR people, like me, present summarised exit interview information such as reasons for leaving, and  some managers and leaders, not all, reject the information. In these situations, HR people, like me, feel sad that the exiting employees have been honest and spent time helping to make an organisation a better place, but to no avail.

In one particularly memorable organisation, a senior leader actually lied about why another senior leader left. He said she left because she wanted to spend more time with her children and was spending too much time travelling and on teleconferences at all hours of the night. She was going to take some time out. She had actually found a much better organisation to work for, but the other leader couldn't comprehend that.

So what's my advice about participating in exit interviews?

1. You are under no obligation to participate in one. HR people, like me, appreciate when you do though, and you really have nothing to lose.
2. Be constructive. Doing a complete dump about how awful XYZ Company is doesn't really help anyone. Well it might help you a little. HR people, like me, are usually trying to do a good job for you and the company.
3. Burning your bridges is never a good idea so don't do the group email rant. The CEO and your work mates will just think you are a clown, even if they agree with what you have written!
4. Don't expect anything to change and you are leaving anyway

What is your experience with exit interviews?

*less shit is an important HR term

Change is as good as a holiday.

Well that's bullshit crap rubbish! I mean really. Lie on a beach drinking cocktails, or sell your house in 4 weeks? Sightsee in a new city, or pack up your life in 2 days? Go skiing for a week or move to another country with a 2 year old and 5 year old?

I mean what is more stressful in your opinion?

When I moved to Sydney 13 years ago, I got to do a little work with Expatriates. I helped organise cultural training for employees and their families moving to countries in Asia and also assisted with medical insurance claims. My experience left me with 2 indelible thoughts.

1. Expat employees are difficult, and
2. How amazing would it be to move to another country to live and work?

My first experience with Expat families was when the company I worked for, sent two employees to the Philippines, one as the head of the business and the other in a finance role. I helped organise the cultural training for a family of 4 (2 adults and 2 kids) and a couple. I was able to sit in on the training so I understood what it was all about, and subsequently desperately wanted to move to Manila with them! 

I have visited Manila since then and perhaps it wouldn't be my first choice for an Expat assignment but the idea that I could live and work in another country seemed exciting none the less.

Now I realise that perhaps those Expats were not so much difficult, they were just stressed! Actually, some of them were probably difficult but overall I just didn't understand the head exploding stress of packing up your whole life and moving to a different country where everything is slightly or very different, you don't understand the culture and you are still expected to do a good job. 

Over the past 4 weeks Arran and I have been in Singapore I have been reflecting on how we approached this change and how this approach has helped us through a difficult period. We approached the move with excitement and possibilities. We knew that we couldn't have the same style of housing that we had in Sydney so we decided to embrace condominium living. We knew we would be living in a much smaller place so we got rid of a lot of our furniture (not enough as it turns out) but we have the motivation of people visiting us soon will get us organized quickly in our smallish apartment!

Moving in day. Rainy and humid. View from our balcony

 

We have a view of the pool just 4 floors down, which someone else maintains as well as a kids playground and beautiful gardens. We have apartments all around us and instead of feeling overlooked we feel part of a big busy city. Sitting on our large-by-Singaporean-standards balcony drinking wine and blogging in the humid air is bliss!

View from our balcony as the sun sets

We have both started to make contact with people with know here. Me with a lovely colleague I met when working at Coca-Cola Amatil, who took me to just the kind of place I needed for coffee, and Arran a friend (and his wife) from high school, who invited us to their "condo" for drinks nibbles and dinner (just when we were getting sick of each others company). I also have other friends who are ready to catch up when we are. Both of us enjoyed a dinner with some of my new work mates in Singapore. Networks and contacts are important and in the 4 weeks we have,been here we have missed our social life and are looking forward to seriously ramping it up.

I'm sure if you approached an opportunity like this negatively you are never going to have fun or learn from it. If you expect things to be like home, they won't be. If you expect the same kind of housing with the same amount of room, you will be disappointed and if you expect people to be the same, well you are kidding yourself. And if you expect the weather to be the same and the ability to buy the same food and clothes well I guess you should give up*

How does this to relate to your career? Well I think it relates very well. Sometimes we end up in a place where we are not happy, and we don't really know how we got there and we don't know how to get out and move forward. This is a miserable existence and when I have been there myself my health suffered and so did those around me.  In these circumstances it's hard to get positive. The ability to make a deal with yourself about what you can learn for the experience and how long you are going to put with where you are can make a massive difference. It can get you focused with purpose in the short term.

I'm not feeling this way about my career. I'm generally happy. How could I not be? I have reached a  career goal and I still have so much to learn including the best way to work with a new business leader. Everything I touch at the moment seems hard and I don't know the answer, but I guess I will get there, as I have done before. I have never set up a payroll in South Korea, but I'm learning. I have never supported employees in the Middle East or Kazakhstan but I'm learning. Actually I'm still learning to even spell Kazakhstan! What did we do before spell check?

So tell me about when your career has been hard for you. How did you get through it?

Lisa xx

*I have already felt like giving up trying to buy swimmers. I'm only human.

Time out

Back in February I was offered a place in Explore for Success's Executive Women's Forum. I helped out at their book launch for Unexpected Women and they offered me a place in kind. I was flattered and thrilled, but not really sure what I was in for. There was a general outline which sounded interesting:

• Session 1: Your next chapter - thinking about your next 5 - 10 years of your career
• Session 2: Executive Presence - cultivating your executive brand
• Session 3: Advocacy and Sponsorship - establishing sponsors to support your career
• Session 4: Ambassador of inclusion - helping others in your workplace to be successful
• Session 5: Embracing your worth - authority and financial worth

I liked the structure of the program, half a day every month,  and figured I had nothing to lose. Plus, I have learnt that taking some time out of your day to day role to think and reflect is a valuable activity in of itself. I try to take opportunities as they come my way, and this was no different.

The first thing I loved on that first day was meeting all these strong and amazing women, from various industries and disciplines. I have always worked for very male dominated companies, and I'm ok with that, and most of the time I really enjoy my job. That doesn't mean that once you are in room with lots of great women you don't take advantage of the situation!

This is a great program if you are looking to take that next step into the executive ranks, or you might already there but need some help and support. If you think this could be for you, I'm on good authority that there is a few places left for the program in Sydney starting in August. You can get some more info here.

This is not a sponsored post. I just believe in and support what Explore do in our business community for women.

Lisa xx

You have reached your goal. Now what?

 

A few weeks ago I was looking for inspiration for this blog. What else could I write about? What would be interesting? My husband Arran suggested writing about what you should do when you have reached your goal. I thought it was a great idea. I thought that you would like to read about it. I had no idea what to write, until very recently, I reached one of my goals!

One of my life/career goals has been to live and work in another country. To have that experience of working day in and day out in another culture. To live in a different city with different foods and ways of living. I have always enjoyed the roles in global companies where I have had the opportunity to travel and work with people with completely different life experiences but have never had the opportunity, until now, to pack up my life and leave Australia.

This week I signed my offer to move to Singapore with the company I currently work for. Squeal. I have been trying not to get too excited because I have been offered a similar move before. Arran and I had done lots of research, bought books, researched housing but the move didn’t come off. We had moved our life in our head to another country and it was disappointing when it didn’t happen. I wasn’t making the same mistake this time.

It's real this time. Arran, Aiden, Charlie and I are packing up our life and heading to hot and humid Singapore. What an adventure.

It’s a fantastic opportunity and I’m really excited. And it’s certainly not just about moving to another country. I will have the opportunity to work with a new leader on a whole new business strategy. I will get to apply my HR expertise to situations and countries that I have never done before, and I don’t know how to do it. I will get to work more closely with leaders from across Asia and the Middle East. And I will learn about how business is conducted in these countries.

 When I think back to other times I reached a goal or career milestone, there has never been a feeling of “I’ve made it”, more the feeling of “OMG, how am I going to do this job?”. I clearly remember feeling this when I was promoted to Assistant Store Manager, when I worked in retail. While I was excited to be recognized that I was up for this role, my main thoughts were about “what do I do when the Store Manager is away?” “How will I deal with upset customers?” “How will I know how to manage employees?” I don’t remember feeling how good I was. I remember all the things I didn’t know how to do yet!

 My thoughts on the Singapore move have been:

"How will I continue to support all the leaders effectively?"

"How will I ensure my team members in Australia get the support, direction and development they need?"

I will still be travelling a lot, so "how will I ensure my family is OK when I have moved them to another country?"

I got the opportunity because I have worked hard and performed well so "how do I continue to perform at a high level when coping with a new country, new culture and new challenges?"

For me the feeling of satisfaction of reaching a goal is fleeting. There is initial excitement but that soon turns to focus on how to deliver now that I have reached that goal and that's my recommendation. Take a little time to celebrate your achievement but get focused on what you need to do next! What's the next goal? What's the next thing to strive for?

Career limiting moves

I usually write about the positive stuff. The stuff to help you with your career. The stuff to make it better, more fruitful, more satisfying.

Today that is not the case. Today I received an email that one male employee had forwarded to many other employees and customers which contained photos of naked women in poses and situations which would be considered demeaning. I’m definitely not a prude and on one hand this stuff is mostly harmless. On the other hand I wonder how much we have really progressed in organisations to attain equality of pay and positions for women when there is still this undercurrent of women being presented and treated as sexual objects and as comedic relief for men. Is this how they imagine the women that work with?

 Of course using our electronic systems to distribute this kind of content is prohibited. As most companies do, we have all sorts of policies which address this kind of stuff – from acceptable use of our IT systems to harassment and discrimination policies, and I’m now in the situation of dealing with a number of employees who are probably considered valuable members of their team, who may or may not keep their job.

 Distributing this information is definitely an obvious career limiting move. If you don’t lose your job over it, at the very least you will not be seen positively. Promotions and other opportunities may not come your way and you will definitely not be viewed in the best light. But what other things can limit your career? Here are my top 5 behaviours that have the potential to limit your career:

 

 1.       Not playing nicely with others.

I once worked with a manager who had an employee in his team who didn’t want to work with others. The days are gone where roles exist for employees to sit in a corner and work alone processing paperwork or number crunching. Today’s organisations are lean with a heavy focus on being able to communicate and collaborate. This employee refused to attend meetings, refused to share information with other team members and was generally a very difficult person to deal with. He was asked to continue his career somewhere else.

2.       Being difficult
I reckon I can get on and work with most people. It doesn’t mean I always like everyone but man, there is a person I have worked with who was so difficult that nearly every time I needed to speak to this person there would be a disagreement about what I was trying to achieve. I often just needed a short answer or a document review and this person was supposed to be a business partner and resource. At the very least an equal in supporting what the business required.

They turned out to be the opposite and other leaders in the business admitted that they left things to the last minute before having to talk to this person, and only then it was out of desperation. It was never pleasant dealing with this person. Ugh!

Having people who will support you in your organisation is important if you want to progress. The more senior you become the more important it is to be seen as credible and have sound influencing skills. Crucial skills in developing your career.
 
3.       Being too sensitive
We all have tough times at work. We are human and it’s kinda hard to check your emotions at the door. I don’t expect anyone to do this and it’s ok to cry at work BUT the person who continually gets upset or worked up about EVERYTHING does not make for a pleasant workplace. The person you have to tippy-toe around or the person that if you even look sideways at and they become upset or offended is very very difficult. These people also make giving feedback hard.  If others are afraid to give you feedback because you will burst into tears or will make a bullying complaint, well you may not have a fruitful career. You will be avoided at all costs. Just saying.
 
Most large companies have employee assistance programs (EAP) who offer free counseling if you are struggling to cope with life or GP’s (in Australia at least) can provide referrals to psychologists and counselors which initially can be funded through Medicare . Get some help. Most people just need some help with some coping strategies to get them back on track.

 4.       Being obnoxious

I have worked with a couple of people like this. I’m sure you know some too. These are the people who say inappropriate and offensive things at inappropriate moments. Sometimes it comes out work events with the additional of alcohol and sometimes it’s at Wednesday at 10.30am in the meeting about improving a business processes.

Other people that fall under this category are those who are so egotistical that they expect everyone to work the hours they do, and at the standard they do. Other’s become scared of these people and avoid them at all costs – it’s hard to progress in your career if no one wants to be near you, let alone work with you.
 
5.       Being defensive
At the risk of sounding slightly unstable, a few years ago I made friends with the voice in my head which tells me to shut up when I feel the need to defend. The problem with being defensive is that it comes from an emotional place. If you end up in an emotional space it can be hard to communicate clearly and get the best outcome you want. I’m ok with emotion (in fact emotion drives passion and engagement) but the trick is to use it for effect. To have control and use it wisely. If you have a tendency to always defend, you are not listening, not taking in information and not being effective.

When I first started in my corporate career I was definitely defensive. My Manager used to hold up his hand to say “stop”. Stop talking and stop defending. Now my little voice does that and it’s so effective. I’m now able to truly understand why someone may have an issue with me and not be emotional in my reaction. It means that I am in a place where I can ask questions, gain more clarify and get a better outcome. It also puts me in a place that if I need to explain my position I have control over what and how I’m saying it. I get to say my piece with a better chance that someone else will listen. I’d like to say I’m good at it all the time, but of course I’m not. But I’m really conscious of it.

There are many career limiting moves I can think of – many very obvious, but it’s the more subtle ones like the 5 outlined above which are more insidious and hard to identify, but will make the biggest difference in reaching your career goals if you can tackle them.

Lisa xx

Dress for Success

You probably think I'm going to write about clothes and your career. Well, kind of. It's actually a topic I could bang on about in a number of posts....how taking pride in what you wear shows pride in your work....how you can dress well without spending a lot of money.....dressing to suit your shape and job....dressing to get the job you want....

BUT, I'm going to write about syncronicity and supporting a charity, how important connections are, and how taking an opportunity can lead to other opportunities. The main point is to tell you about Dress for Success. The best way you can learn about this great organisation, is to watch this video.

This week I attended one of their business dinners, as a guest of Xplore for Success and was reminded again what an amazing organisation they are. They help women who are struggling or disadvantaged to achieve financial independence by helping them to find jobs. Their main level is support is dressing them for job interviews, through donated clothing, but other support includes helping with resume writing and teaching interview skills.

I first became aware of Dress for Success through Amanda Webb, an amazing woman and a friend, who runs her own business, my favourite part being her OneDay NewWays conference. Amanda supports Dress for Success as one of her chosen charities. Through Amanda I got interested, I attended volunteer training - to help dress their clients, and then did nothing. I couldn't even get my shit organised to donate clothes. What's wrong with me? Seriously, I live a great life and couldn't even volunteer for a few hours every couple of weeks. Life, work and babies got in the way.

With my guilt rising I came to the realisation that it's not like I do nothing. For the past 12 years, ever since I travelled back and forth to work to India over a 12 month period for work, I have sponsored a child with World Vision and supported a community fund with them. I am lucky to be in a position with my work to coordinate and lead support of community organisations and charities including RU OK? and Tour De Cure. I also support friends in their various charity endeavors but somehow if never feels quite enough.

But man, this organisation is persistent! It keeps coming back into my life. Through events I attend, other women I meet and connections I have made. These all keep bringing me back and reminding me that this organisation is something I need to be involved with, or at least support in some way.
Dress for Success is a perfect match for what I think is important. I believe dressing well helps boost your confidence and creating a good first impression goes a long way to securing a job. I also believe that having a job is important as it supports self esteem and financial independence. I ranted wrote about it here.

I have realised that at this time in my life, volunteering my time is just not going to work. I travel a lot and time with my two small boys and husband is precious. This needs to be my focus now, so I will support in other ways. I will attend their events, donate clothes and do things like spread the word with blog posts like this one.


When I was being interviewed for my current role, I learnt that part of the role in the first 6 months or so would be to bring together our employees into one default superannuation fund. I'm kinda passionate about super. About employees taking an active role in part of their remuneration that doesn't get thought about much. About making decisions about how their money is invested and how they protect themselves and their family through insurance. About considering whether enough money is going into their super account.

I also love clothes and fashion.

So this is why I think Dress for Success is such a fantastic organisation to support. Helping women feel great about themselves by having a great interview outfit - leads to creating a good first impression and in many cases a job, which leads to financial independence. I have to stop ignoring the "universe" which keeps telling me to find a way to support this charity.

This is my first step.